The Eight Ball [8Ball]

I covet a biscuit from my childhood. To address my problem, I must know its name.

The biscuit is thus: ridges of biscuit outside, with a thin layer of orange (or apricot) flavour on the bottom, and a circle of chocolate (about 5mm thick) on top.

A crude artist might draw it as such:

As with all good biscuits, I believe it was made by Griffins.

I remember it being off the market for a few years, then back, and then gone again.  I don’t expect it’s around now and I can’t find it on their website.

Anyone remember the name?

Say no to bottles! Embrace the can!

• Smaller carbon footprint
• Can be compacted to a fraction of their original size
• Compacting cans is a fun party activity
• We only have one glass smelter in NZ and all our glass for recycling is just being stock piled until they have the capacity to do it.
• Cans cool down 5 times faster than bottles in ice
• Cans fit in the fridge better
• Full cans are very difficult to break
• Smashing an empty beer can on your forehead is much less painful than with a bottle
• Canned beer is not exposed to light
• Bottled drinks do not taste better
• If you put a canned drink in the freezer to cool it down quicker and forget about it, it is much less likely to explode, a bottle will

Preference for drinking from bottles is purely a perception thing; drinking from cans is perceived as being a poor mans thing to do and the perception is also that mass produced and/or poor quality drinks come in cans.  This is not true!  Cans are simply more practical.

Embrace the can people!!

You must check this video out, it’s a video promotion for the first ever McDonalds to open in NZ.  Bit of a blast from the past but the reason I found it so cool was how the old burger boxes were designed, they are flippin’ awesome! You must check this out, they should totally bring these boxes back!!

Read this on the Flight of the Conchords website, very funny

This roast chicken is my staple, my ‘famous’ roast chicken that receives acclaim from many. People carry on about it like it’s something special or hard to achieve. It looks fancy, and tastes outstandingly good. Tender, juicy, moist, and tasty. Best served with your basic vege. I serve it with beans, carrots, roast potatoes, and a gravy made with pan juices and the slow roasted garlic, along with a bit of rosemary. Can’t go wrong. Without further ado, I bring you, my Secret Roast Chicken.

Secret French Roast Chicken

Serves 4

Secret French Roast Chicken

1 large lemon

2 ½ tablespoons olive oil

4 garlic cloves, crushed

4 whole bulbs garlic

1 teaspoon sea salt

1.7kg whole chicken (free range, cleaned, rinsed, patted dry with paper towel)

4 sprigs thyme

Vegies to serve, and gravy

1. Preheat oven to 190°C. Cut lemon in half, juice one half. Set aside other half.

2. Combine 2 tablespoons lemon juice, 2 tablespoons oil, crushed garlic and salt. Season with pepper. Rub this baste all over inside and outside of chicken. Place remaining lemon half, and the thyme, inside the chicken cavity. (If you have unwaxed cooking string, you can tie the legs together, but if you don’t, it’s not essential).

3. Place chicken, breast side down, on a rack in a large roasting pan (if you don’t have a rack it’s no biggie). Roast for 15 minutes. Cut tops off whole garlic bulbs to expose tops of cloves inside. Drizzle garlic with remaining oil.

4. Turn chicken over (breast side up) and place garlic, cut side up, around the chicken. Roast for a further 45 minutes, or until chicken is cooked (to test whether the chicken is cooked, poke it with a fork. If the juices that run out of the holes run clear, it’s cooked. If they’re cloudy, it’s not). Pull out the chicken and transfer to an air tight container to rest for at least 15 minutes. Use this time to pull the roasted cloves out of your garlic bulbs and prepare your gravy. Serve with vegies, gravy, and roasted garlic.

Roasted garlic has a mellow, sweet flavour, and is great for adding flavour to mayonnaises and dressings, along with gravies and glazes. It won’t taint your breath like fresh garlic will. They become soft and squishy. Buy a pre-made gravy if you don’t want to make it yourself, add pan juices, a few roasted garlic cloves chopped up (or mashed) and some rosemary. Tastes like you made it from scratch! The roasted garlic cloves can be eaten on their own, also. They taste lovely smeared on your beans and carrots.

What’s so secret about this French Roast Chicken? How easy it is to prepare. People go on about it like you deserve a Michelin star, when in reality, any fool can prepare this dish. My big secret, is that it’s one of the easiest meals to prepare in my repetoire. But of course, I’m not going to tell that to the people praising me for slaving away in the kitchen. Highly recommend it to anyone scared of doing a roast chicken, you’ll never look back. One of my all time comfort foods.

That’s right. The most dangerous chocolate cake in the world. Give it a try if you dare. Walk on the wild side. Take a risk. Ask yourself, do you have the testicular fortitude for the world’s most dangerous chocolate cake? Will you make it out alive?

5 minute chocolate mug cake

5 Minute Chocolate Mug Cake

4 tablespoons self raising flour

4 tablespoons sugar

2 tablespoons cocoa

1 egg

3 tablespoons milk

3 tablespoons oil

3 tablespoons chocolate drops

1 large mug

1. Add dry ingredients to the mug and mix well.

2. Crack an egg and add it to your mug. Be sure to mix it well to avoid any pockets of flour in the corners.

3. Pour in the milk and oil and mix well.

4. Add the chocolate drops if you’ve got them, (a splash of vanilla essence if you’re feeling up to it, or baileys or some other such delicious liquid)

5. Pop your mug into the microwave and zap for 3 minutes on 1000 watts.

6. Wait until the cake stops rising and sets in the mug. You can eat it straight from the mug, or slide a knife down the sides to loosen it and transfer it to a plate or bowl, for liberal application of whipped cream, ice cream, custard, or chocolate sauce.

“What’s so dangerous about this cake?” I hear you ask? No spiders in the ingredients. No death defying stunts in the preparation. No octochicken. How can it be dangerous?

The answer, my lovelies, is that we are all now 5 minutes away from delicious moist chocolate cake at any given moment. And that strikes fear into the heart of the bravest man. For inside all of us, there is a fatty screaming “MOAR! MOAAARRR!”.

I thought I’d get the 8ball rolling (hah!) on the Indulge section with my world famous Peppercorn Sauce. Made best with a lean beef steak (a decent cut, scotch or eye fillet, a fatty cut of meat tends to make the sauce separate and not look too flash), but also good with schnitzel or chicken. Ridiculously easy, a great “gateway sauce” into the world of condiments. Takes about 15 mins, but you can stretch it out longer by letting it reduce while you get all your other parts of dinner sorted. I serve it with rosemary roast potatoes, beans and carrots, and steak. Very easy to whip this up while the potatoes are doing their thing, and before you put the steaks on. Guaranteed to spark all sorts of moans and noises, this orgasmic little treat is brought to you by the letter O. For “Om nom nom”. Great with a nice soft pinot noir, or light merlot. 

Peppercorn Sauce (or AwesomeSauce, as B would say)

Serves 4 (or 2 that REALLY FREAKING LIKE IT)

• 30g butter (real butter, no marge)
• 1 small onion, finely chopped (or give it a whirl in a food processor if you’re time poor/dexterally challenged)
• 1 garlic clove, crushed
• 55g can green peppercorns, drained (give the can a shake and hold it up to your ear, makes the weirdest noise)
• 1/2 cup beef stock (liquid, obviously…)
• 300ml pure cream (thickened cream etc)

1. Melt butter in a frying pan (NOT saucepan*) over medium heat. Add onion. Cook, stirring for 5 minutes or until softened and transparent. Add garlic and peppercorns. Cook, stirring, for 1 minute until peppercorns really become fragrant.

2. Stir in stock and cream (slowly). Bring to the boil, and reduce heat to medium-low. Simmer for 10 minutes or until reduced by half and thickened. Transfer to warmed gravy boat or pouring jug. (Make sure it’s warmed or the fat will solidify and separate upon touching the cold surface). 

(* Frying pan has more surface area, facilitating easier reduction, ensuring more flavour)

Enjoy! I’d love to hear of you trying it at home, even pics. Rate my sauce, I dare ya.